judging

I want to have my brain wired to someone else. I'm interested in the experience. I had also thought that there would be the potential for a new conscious entity to arise that thought it was both people, but I'm less optimistic about that now after a friend pointed out the structural role of the prefrontal cortex in consciousness, and that there might need to be a new structure added.. though.. thinking about it now as I write.. perhaps the prefrontal cortex itself could be wired to someone else's prefrontal cortex?

Anyway, I was talking to a friend about this. They think the idea is unconventional — not something most people would want to do.

They were speculating about why I would want my brain wired to someone else, and given my relatively anti-social nature, hypothesized that I really am social, and since I have trouble forming bonds in conventional ways, I want to do so in this unconventional way.

I thought about this. I responded that I do value deep connections with people, and wish I could have even deeper connections.

And I do find forging deep connections difficult.

I thought about my main obstacle for getting close to people. I said that the ultimate barrier, for me, is judgement. If I say something, and someone says it is bad, then I stop talking about that line of thought. I still have the line of thought, but I feel like I can't share it with that person, because I don't want them to think badly of me.

But the brain wiring thing is a bit different. I'm interested in consciousness, and I feel like wiring my brain to someone else would be one of many experiments to try and explore the nature of consciousness.