frustration

I was telling a friend about how I tense up when I'm concentrating, but how I couldn't seem to solve difficult math problems without doing this.

He asked why I thought tensing up was a problem.

This was a good question. I had thought I wanted to avoid tensing up because the tension would eventually get me tired and stuck and possibly give me a headache.

However, it occurred to me that that isn't true. I can think for days or weeks about a difficult math problem, and I love it.

The things that get me tired and stuck and give me headaches are particular types of problems. I will try to list some of them here:

• Figuring out whether to throw something out.
• Responding to an e-mail.
• Planning a date and time for something where other people are involved.
• Deciding when a flight should leave.
• Context switching, especially into a difficult project that I don't want to work on (though once I'm working on it, I'm fine, and it's actually painful to context switch away from it).
• others...

I'm frustrated by decisions that seem like they'll potentially have a big impact on my life, but for which I'm not sure what that impact will be, especially when other people are involved.